Love beyond Labels

God's Heart for the Fatherless and Widows

I was recently listening to Giftson Durai's podcast with Joyce, which I really loved. Giftson Durai made a profound statement where he said nobody can understand "grief and rejection."

We, at churches and in our houses, talk about widows, but we rarely talk about them in a good way. As much as I have seen, we are not too different from secular society.

There is a Bible translation called the NRSV, which says in 1 Timothy 5:3, "Honor widows who are really widows." I was shocked by this translation of the Bible. When I looked into another version, the NIV, I found no such wording. In the NIV, it is written, "Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need."

At first, I felt troubled by the wording in the NRSV. I had questions like, "What is a real widow? Isn't it enough that they have lost their husband or wife to become a widow?" As I continued reading the chapter, I understood that Paul was referring to widows who had no family to support them, not redefining who is a widow. Yet the wording made me reflect on how easily we ourselves categorize widows and treat them differently.

I have even seen women giving authoritative advice or making the choice for another young or even older widow to get married because this woman thinks it is right and good for the widow. Do we recklessly talk like this about women and men who have lost their spouse? How do we treat their sons and daughters if they are our sons-in-law or daughters-in-law? Are we boldly confronting a widow's children because there is no father figure?

I am sad that I have to bring our ugly side into confrontation today. I have seen widows who earn and take care of their own living go through a lot. Then how much worse will be the case of widows who rely on their friends and families for their livelihood? How difficult is it for their children to look to another father figure to get something for them? How much are the children losing without a father figure? Insecurity falls over us when our father tries to help a family without a father.

People, none of us can understand another person's pain unless we walk through it. Till then, it is wise to remain calm in the Lord.

I love James 1:27 (NIV):

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

Dear friend, God is not after only families who are privileged to have mothers and fathers by their side. He is the Father of the fatherless and the Defender of widows. If we want to call ourselves religious, we need to look after widows and the fatherless. If we are not helping, at least let us keep ourselves from harming them emotionally. Their Dad, who is our Dad, cares about all of us. He is our heavenly Father who made Cain pay for Abel's blood.

Dear God, we commit every family who has lost their father or mother into Your hands. We ask Your forgiveness when we knowingly or unknowingly made a move that might have hurt them. Give us a heart like Yours when we look at the fatherless and women who have lost their husbands. Fill us with Your compassion, Lord. May we live out what You call true religion. Protect us and our families, dear Lord. Help us to help the fatherless and widows when we see them in need. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.